Why Is God Making Me Wait? What James Says About Patience

Sep 21

Short answer: God has you waiting because Jesus hasn't come back yet, and He is holding off so that as many people as possible can be saved. Until He returns, James says to wait well: do everything you can, trust God with the rest, and be patient with the people around you instead of taking your frustration out on them.

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I don't wait well

I don't wait well. It's one of my flaws, and it shows most in a doctor's office. They text me to show up 15 minutes early. They text me to fill out the paperwork before I get there. I do both. Then my appointment time comes and goes, and I'm still sitting there.

For me, it's a respect thing. If I respect your time enough to plan my day around it, I want you to treat mine as valuable too. Between equals, that's a fair way to feel.

The problem comes when God is the one making me wait. If I'm used to feeling disrespected by people who make me wait, I'll get irritated at Him the same way. That's not okay.

The last part of playing the wrong game

For six weeks in James we've talked about one picture: playing the wrong game. Say everybody's playing Uno, and the group switches to Phase 10. If you say you've switched but keep using Uno's rules, goals, and priorities, you're going to lose. James says that's what it looks like to trust Jesus and keep living like you did before: you're acting like a friend of the world, and friends of the world are enemies of God.

We've seen how that plays out in the way you talk, the way you treat people, the way you get what you want, and how you look at your money and at God in relation to it (more on that one in You're Richer Than You Think: Here's How to Be a Good One).

This is the last one: how you wait. Waiting is one more place where you can say you've switched games and still play by the old rules. So do you wait like a friend of God or like an enemy of God?

Wait like a farmer

"Be patient, therefore, brothers, until the coming of the Lord. See how the farmer waits for the precious fruit of the earth, being patient about it, until it receives the early and the late rains. You also, be patient. Establish your hearts, for the coming of the Lord is at hand." (James 5:7-8)

The word for patient here is about being patient with people, not just enduring your circumstances. And James says to be patient until the coming of the Lord. Jesus said he's coming back. It's been 2,000 years and nobody expected it to take this long, but he is coming.

The farmer's life is a picture of how to wait. Over there, they have two rainy seasons. The fall rain softens the baked ground so he can plant. The spring rain waters the crop through the summer. The farmer does everything he can to get ready, and then he waits, because he can't control the rain.

We just had the driest, hottest August in history in Arkansas, and a friend of mine is feeding his winter hay to keep his cows alive. There's nothing anyone can do about it. You can get mad or frustrated. It doesn't help.

James says to wait the same way. Do everything within your power, and then wait.

Patience is God's work and yours

"Establish your hearts" means do it on purpose. If you say "I'm not a patient person," remember that as an infant I wasn't a person who used a toilet either. I grew. Maturity turns you into that kind of person.

James isn't writing only to people who already find this easy. He's telling all of us to work at it. But it isn't all on you, because patience is something God produces in us.

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law." (Galatians 5:22-23)

In our discipleship group this week we talked about joy. We're four guys in our 40s and up, so joy isn't the word you'd use for us. My default is grumpy. But the Spirit of God wants to produce joy in me anyway, despite who I am, and the more time I spend with God, the more of it is produced in me. Patience is the same way.

That doesn't mean you sit back. Your part is effort. A lot of things I don't know how to do, I have to do anyway, and I have to put effort into them. You put effort into keeping your mouth shut instead of griping. You put effort into being kind when you don't feel like it. You put effort into praising God in the middle of a hard circumstance.

Don't turn on the people in the back seat

"Do not grumble against one another, brothers, so that you may not be judged; behold, the Judge is standing at the door." (James 5:9)

"Grumble" is more than complaining out loud. It's an attitude of the heart: how you think about people and approach them, even when you're not talking to them.

James has already talked about our words several times, and we spent a whole message on that in Why Your Words Could Be Quietly Wrecking Your Life. Some of us have gotten really good at closing our mouths without changing anything inside. If God changes what's going on inside you, you don't have to work so hard to keep your mouth shut.

That's also why he mentions being judged. When you tear people down with your words, you're acting as judge. We covered that in Why Talking Trash About Someone Says More About You Than Them.

"The Judge is standing at the door" reminds me of bedtime when my kids were little. We'd do bath time, read a story, pray, sing a song, pray again, and shut the door.

But the kids weren't ready to go to bed. They'd get up and play the minute the door closed. So I'd shut the door and stand right outside and wait. As soon as I heard them get out of bed and start doing things they weren't supposed to, I'd open the door. "What are you doing?"

That's the picture James gives. We think, "Jesus is taking forever to come back, so this isn't going to be a problem. I don't have to work on my attitude toward the people in this church, or other believers, or lost people. That's a problem for tomorrow, and Jesus is a long way off."

James says no. Dad is right outside with his hand on the door, and he can hear what's going on through it. Jesus's return is taking a while, but He's standing at the door listening, and you're not getting away with any of this.

The picture that comes to mind for me is a road trip when I was a kid. This was before iPads and in-car DVD players, so you sat in the back seat and listened to whatever Dad picked. In our house that meant Steve Miller Band. I passed the time watching raindrops on the window or playing with the ashtray.

What I did have was a brother in the seat next to me, stuck with the same boredom. That set up a choice. We could play, imagine, and talk, and the trip would fly by. Or we could get on each other's nerves. After enough hours in a car, he was the only person I could take it out on, so we'd argue over where his side of the seat ended and mine began. Then Dad would start talking about pulling the car over.

Every trip came down to that choice, and it was ours to make: get along and enjoy the ride, or fight and make it miserable for everybody.

That's how I read James. God is driving, and you have no idea how long the trip will take. But you're not alone in the car. How you treat the people in the back seat with you decides what kind of trip it is. You can decide on purpose not to be miserable to ride with, or you can take your frustration out on them. James says to choose the first, because Dad is in the front seat listening, and he will pull the car over.

Look at the prophets and Job

"As an example of suffering and patience, brothers, take the prophets who spoke in the name of the Lord. Behold, we consider those blessed who remained steadfast. You have heard of the steadfastness of Job, and you have seen the purpose of the Lord, how the Lord is compassionate and merciful." (James 5:10-11)

Nobody looks at Abraham, David, or Elijah and says, "I'm mad at God for what He put them through." We hold them up as heroes. So why do we look at our own circumstances and say, "Can this be over yet?" Would your childhood hero still be your hero if they hadn't been forced to wait?

Then James picks Job, and that's my favorite part. My mental picture of "patient" is a sweet, easygoing person who never gets upset. That isn't Job. Listen to him.

"I loathe my life; I will give free utterance to my complaint; I will speak in the bitterness of my soul. I will say to God, Do not condemn me; let me know why you contend against me. Does it seem good to you to oppress, to despise the work of your hands and favor the designs of the wicked?" (Job 10:1-3)

"Why do you hide your face and count me as your enemy?" (Job 13:24)

"I cry to you for help and you do not answer me; I stand, and you only look at me." (Job 30:20)

That doesn't sound patient. But Job told God exactly what he thought. What makes him patient is what he didn't do. He never turned his back on God.

"The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD." (Job 1:21)

He also never walked away from the believers around him, even though his friends were miserable companions who kept getting it wrong. The patience of Job is not a meek little lamb who never gets upset. It's someone who still complains and still gets upset, but sticks with God and God's people anyway.

Why is God waiting?

James finally gives us something to hang on to: "you have seen the purpose of the Lord, how the Lord is compassionate and merciful." God is waiting so that as many as possible might come to know Him. There will be more people in heaven because we had to wait.

Years ago I sat in an ER with an infected finger, hurting and ready to go. Someone else came in on a stretcher with paramedics and oxygen, and they took him straight back ahead of me. I didn't know what was wrong with him, but I knew he needed help more than I did. I could wait.

If waiting means someone else gets to come with us, I can wait.

What does it mean to be patient with God?

Every problem you have is one you'd be free of if Jesus came back today. The job, the relationship, the sickness, the money. This isn't a bus station where you sit until the bus arrives. We have to live in the meantime.

So being patient with God means applying everything we've talked about in James and living like a friend of God in every circumstance. Be kind to the people around you. Treat them the way you want to be treated. They're in the back seat with you.

If you need to yell at God, that's okay. He may correct you, and that may be uncomfortable. But God didn't condemn Job for struggling. He defended Job, because in spite of it Job still honored and obeyed Him.

The sin you fight every day belongs here too. There are things you can do about it: humble yourself, submit to God, draw near to Him, and resist temptation. We walked through that in I Can Predict Your Future (And So Can You).

Your waiting changes you, not the wait

My complaints in the back seat never shortened the trip. Asking "are we there yet?" doesn't make the miles any shorter. All it did was make the wait worse.

The way you wait affects you and the people around you. It doesn't change how long you wait. So you can make yourself and everyone around you miserable, or you can accept that you have to wait and make it more enjoyable.

How will you wait?

Will you do all you can and then honor God while you wait? Will you extend kindness, grace, and mercy to the people in your life? Will you wait like a friend of God or like an enemy of God?

I can't make you choose. All I can do is lay out the options. You can make this car ride as enjoyable as possible, or you can make it miserable for everybody.

If you don't know Jesus yet, this is the reason He's waiting. He is compassionate and merciful, and He wants you. Realize you're a sinner, believe Jesus is the only Son of God, and cry out to Him for forgiveness and rescue. He's ready right now.